'I’m a wetter,' he declares,
proudly ticking the yellow box.
he’ll hack you apart.
He’ll stare you down,
but with the kindest of eyes.
He’s a genuine sort of fellow –
that’s what he wants you to believe.
He has taste –
I’m sure Ralph and Hugo would agree.
He’ll outdo you
in connections, ambition, and wit.
He’s the full package.
He’ll do the unspeakable
to further his career.
But then again, can we blame him?
After all, dignity is overrated.